Opening the Cabinet

Your tour is about to begin.  After a few sips of wine, a slice of cheese, a relaxed respite in the kitchen, you hear the clanks of a key in the far door.  There is a click and the door opens.  A gentleman leans in.  His hair twists upward in knots, and he twirls a monocle in his left hand before stepping into the room. He is a tall gentleman in a grey suit coat, quilted vest, and pinstriped pleated pants tucked into brown leather boots.  He speaks in a thick Italian accent.

We have been waiting for you.  The Cabinet is ready for your tour.

Stepping aside he lets you through the door then closing it behind you he locks it.

Straight down the hall please.

You pass down a long wood paneled hall that ends in a steep staircase.  Your guide speaks over your shoulder.

What happens in these halls is utterly unique, and it works by it’s own reason.  You may not remember what happens here when you wake in the morning.  Some say it is a side effect of the wines we cultivate, but I believe it is the peculiar nature of the Cabinet. We are not a part of the world beyond these walls.  Our only concern is what occurs here.

You descend the staircase and find yourself on a large landing.  In the center of the room stands a small table with 3 bottles of champagne and fluted glasses.  Some 16 or so people mill about the room drinking.  They are animated and anxious.  The Guide pours  you a glass then turns his attention to the group as a whole.

Welcome to the Cabinet of Curiosities, a compendium of all things culinary, a pantry of wonders, as we like to call it, that stretches across time and space.  Tonight you will experience a select portion of our Exhibits open to the public for a brief span of time.  Through this series of dioramas we explore our complex relationships with food.

As you entered the Cabinet you no doubt noticed a subtle shift in the air.  Some describe it as a ripple passing over the scalp.  This is the barrier between outside the Cabinet and inside the Cabinet.

Did you experience it?  Well, perhaps not you with that beautiful lady on your arm.  And you, you look rather daft so you may have missed it.  And you, you seem intent on dreaming rather than paying attention.  And you, well you’re obviously drunk.  Well, perhaps not one of you caught it, but believe me, the change was there.  You have stepped over a threshold.

We here include the Novelty and Rarity, the Foreign and the Exotic, the Strange and the Bizarre, the Transcendent and the Sublime, and the Surprising and the Unexpected.  Tonight we remember what it is to Wonder.

So much for the introductions.  Chef Nordo demands we say that every time.  I think it’s his favorite part.

How is everyone this evening?  I hope the journey was comfortable.  Every once in awhile the “inter-dimensional travel” doesn’t sit well and, as you can imagine, it causes indigestion on the cosmic level.

Before we begin I am required to ask.  Is everyone here from Seattle 2012?  Everyone?